Quick Reference Guide to Election 2008 Terminology

Bailout – Financial transaction that benefits a bogyman. (See also socialist.) Also, any loan, funding, acquisition, or other intervention by the government with which someone does not agree. (See bogyman.)

Big Oil – Generally, large companies that explore for and produce crude oil, refine it into products including gasoline, diesel, heating oil, and chemicals such as propylene, ethylene, benzene, and other aromatics, and deliver it for sale to the market.

Bogyman – The cause of what is wrong. (See Big Oil, George W. Bush, socialist)

Deduction – A method of tax reduction for the deserving (See middle class, tax credit, loophole).

Experienced – Qualitative term applied to the personal credentials of my candidate.

Inexperienced – Qualitative term applied to the personal credentials of the other candidate.

Hero – One who participated in, or was the victim of, an event in which there was great danger or carnage, whether willing or unwilling.

Immigrant – A person who moves from one country to another.

Illegal Immigrant – A pejorative term applied to a selected few of the ‘poor and huddled masses’ by racist right wing zealots.

Little Oil – Mythically, small companies that explore for and produce crude oil, refine it into products including gasoline, diesel, heating oil, and chemicals such as propylene, ethylene, benzene, and other aromatics, and deliver it for sale to the market. (See Big Foot.)

Leader – One who is elected to an office, or aspires to the same, and espouses ideas gleaned from polls of popular opinion.

Lobbyists – The other party’s candidate’s policy experts. (See also advisors.)

Loophole – A deduction for someone else. (See Big Oil, bogeyman, )

Main street – The good part of the economy. (See mortgage brokers, used car salesmen, lawyers, bankers, payday lenders, plumbers.)

Policy experts – Knowledgeable advisors experienced in business and industry.

Pig – Policeman. Alternatively, a candidate of the other party. (See pig, lipstick on.)

Political – Action by the other party, a member or a candidate of the other party.

Patriotic – Action by my party, a member, or a candidate of my party.

Socialist – Government program or intervention with which I disagree. (See also bailout.)

Special interests – Individuals and groups with which you don’t agree.

Strategist – Person who quotes a political party’s talking-points-of-the-day regardless of the topic of a question or discussion.

Wall street – The bad part of the economy. (See investment bankers, stock brokers, analysts, traders, retirement fund managers.)