Been There, Done That

I’ve been notoriously bad as a football prognosticator, including that “sure fire” Las Vegas parlay of last year’s bowl games. Mercifully, we didn’t pay much for the humiliation.

At the beginning of the season, I derided the Packers for not retiring Brett Favre. I poked fun at the Motor City Kitties (who started strong, but have come back to earth), and I had nothing good to say about Vikings coaching or quarterbacking. The Bears were the defending NFC champs, so you have to give me some slack for being on their bandwagon.

My picks for the NFC North were the Bears, followed – distantly – by the Packers, with the Lions and Vikings contending for the league’s futility trophy. (The Dolphins have that wrapped up now, though the Raiders and 49ers have made them work for it.) I was pretty sure that the collection of teams once known as the Black and Blue division was now the worst in the league.

How wrong can you be? OK, there’s that parley card.... But this is pretty bad. The Bears are at the Humphrey Metrodome tonight to play the perhaps playoff-bound Vikings. The Monsters of the Midway are out of the running. The cheezeheads are celebrating the Pack’s tied-for-best NFC record. And the Lions? They’re still Kitties, but six wins is a modern era high water mark. The Black and Blue is a not-too-shabby 21-15 against the rest of the league. For perspective, the formerly much-feared AFC West is a putrid 13-23 playing outside their division.

So that brings us to tonight’s tilt in the Hump. The Chicago press is dismissive of the Bears, and despairing of any but a Vikings romp. Sun Times columnist and ESPN contributor Jay Mariotti wrote today,

“ ‘RRRRRRR-UUUUUUU!!!' the trumpet echoes in all its Nordic power, followed by an equally maddening fight song (``Skol Vikings, let's win this game! Skol Vikings, honor your name!'') when they score a touchdown or field goal.”

The Bears will be hearing the toot all night.”

Then he and five of his Sun Times colleagues unanimously picked the Viking winners in a walk.

Which is why I’m prepared for a Scandinavian loss. Call it contrarian. Call it “been there, done that.” Whatever. I remember the 1998 NFC championship game, the 1961 Rose Bowl, four Super Bowls, recent Twins playoff “runs.” Well, you get the picture. “Sure things” are too often like my prediction for the NFC North, or that parley card. Bring ‘em on. I’m ready. For anything.